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What's all this then?

...or, now that you've got me here...

ChromeWeb is a site where anything is possible. No, wait. ChromeWeb is a synergistic blending of the today and the tomorrow. Umm, ChromeWeb is a website? That's it.

More specifically ChromeWeb is the personal fiefdom of Matt Egen. I'm a software developer, infrastructure administrator, and general geek (in the techy sense, not the carny sense) in the San Francisco Bay Area. My programming language of choice is C# under the Microsoft .NET Framework. I suppose it's also C# under Mono but I haven't played with Mono much and I wouldn't want people to think I was putting on airs.

I've only been published once, in TechRepublic, for an article titled "Let VB and simple APIs break your fall when shutting down NT boxes remotely."  Try not to be too mean while you mock it.

The only quote that I am known for (to my knowledge at least) is " plus paper equals fire, and fire plus computers equals bad", which I was quoted as saying in an article by Annalee Newitz on SFGate entitled "Invisible Heroes - The life and times of sysadmins".
Of course Annalee is all famous and everything now and even has her own Wikipedia entry and I don't.

Speaking of famous people, I went to the same high-school as Aisha Tyler, Sam Rockwell, Margaret Cho, and Kira Soltanovich. Of all of them the only one that I can 100% claim to have known personally was Kira. Aisha Tyler, Sam Rockwell, and Margaret Cho were all there when I was, but I can't claim to have known them really well, if at all. If I did and am just being a forgetful dork then please forgive me Aisha, Sam, and Margaret ;)
Again, all famous people and I'm just a developer. There's a common thread here me thinks.

Anyway, on with the rules and such before I get depressed.

General Disclaimer

ChromeWeb may contain views and ideas that disagree with you, your political party or the messages you are receiving from Venus. If that's the case, tough. I suggest you go out and re-read the Constitution

Legal mumbo jumbo (a.k.a. "Terms of Use") follows:

By accessing this website, you agree to these terms. You don't like it? Go somewhere else.

External Links

This site may contain links to external sites, guess what? This site does not control those sites. Therefore, anything you see there isn't our fault. You don't like what's on the other sites? Talk to them about it. You don't like their privacy policies? Once again, not my problem. Why are you going to other sites anyway? Shouldn't you be spending all your free time here? That's what I would do.

Copyright(© <-- that thingy)

Anything that is written, published, posted, or hosted on this site, by the owner of this site or their agent (meaning if you send me something and I post it) is protected under U.S. and international copyright laws. Any thing on someone else's site, is their responsibility and their property.

Occasionally, we may comment on other peoples material in a "Fair-Use" kind of way (generally when making fun of the news or the people in it), however, if you see something on this site that you think violates your copyright in any way, tell us about it and we will see if we are within our rights in using it and if not we will remove it. Fair enough? Send an email to: Copyright Violation

Trademarks (® <--that thingy)

We don't have any trademarks (well, at least none registered) but don't steal our stuff. As for other trademarks, they are the property of their respective owners.

Privacy Policy Notice

We don't care who you are. However, we do keep some very boring data on basic web site visits and usage information (who looked at what for how long, what type of browser you used, that type of stuff.) We don't keep any personally identifiable information about you except for maybe your IP address.

Frankly, we aren't that interested in who you are, and we really doubt you're that interested in this site (if the aforementioned logs are telling the truth.) With that in mind, we do keep track of any sort of illegal activities that may be taken against this server, its host, network, neighbors, relatives, pets, etc. All such actions are logged and those logs will be made available to the appropriate law enforcement.

Notice: The above statement obviously doesn't apply if you have registered an account with us, but be assured that we won't share your personal information with any third parties without your express permission. Not that we're planning on doing that anytime soon, we just have to cover the legal bases as it were.

More Legal Mumbo Jumbo

This website is published in the United States of America, therefore anything on this website is governed under the laws of the United States of America. More specifically, this website is published in the State of California, in the United States of America. No other country, state or legislative body in any way shape or form has any jurisdiction of law over this website except for California and The United States of America and even their jurisdiction is limited to applicable federal and state law as limited by the Constitution of the United States of America.

This website is intended for viewing by people in the United States. If you are visiting from a country other than the United States, you accept and understand that only United States law shall apply to this website and any and all material contained within it. If any materials or information on this website is banned, blocked, verboten, illegal, immoral or apostastic in your country or region, then accessing it is at your own risk and responsibility.If the above statement applies to you, I would highly recommend leaving your country or region as it sounds like a very oppressive place.

Seriously though, I don't need hassles from some foreign country and their laws. We're already blocked in some countries and while I personally consider that a badge of honor (I mean, hey, you noticed me!) I don't need some foreign country sending their enforcers after me or complaining to the United Nations about how I hurt their sovereign pride or something like that

Wow, Even More Legal Mumbo Jumbo

This is a private website and nothing published here in any way shape or form reflects the views, policies, procedures, or beliefs of any employer of mine at any time.

The information contained in this website is for general information purposes only. The information is provided by me, and while I endeavour to keep the information up to date and correct, I make no representations or warranties of any kind, express or implied, about the completeness, accuracy, reliability, suitability or availability with respect to the website or the information, products, services, or related graphics contained on the website for any purpose. Any reliance you place on such information is therefore strictly at your own risk. In no event will I be liable for any loss or damage including without limitation, indirect or consequential loss or damage, or any loss or damage whatsoever arising from loss of data or profits arising out of, or in connection with, the use of this website.